«THERE SHOULD BE COURSE IN FIRST GRADE ON LOVE»

Miley Cyrus gave a 44-year-old gay director a lap dance. Isaac Mizrahi grabbed Scarlett Johansson's boob. Gay men and straight girls: Keep stray hands, butts, and body parts to yourselves. Just because there's no sexual tension doesn't mean it's OK.Among the greatest pitfalls of the gay guy-straight girl friendship (right after the odious phrase "fag hag") is the notion that, because they do not want to fuck each other, gay men and straight women can violate each others' personal boundaries. It happens all the time. It is unwelcome. Straight girls, I don't care how many times you saw Megan Mullally squeeze Sean Hayes' ass on Will and Grace. Just because you're directing your skankadoodle energy at a man who will not take you up on the offer doesn't mean your skankiness does not count—or that he wants to be subjected to it. Do not touch gay acquaintances' butts. Do not grab their junk. Even if you have one of those relationships where nonsexual pawing is the norm, think of the innocent onlookers—think of the children, forced to flee the room with covered eyes when 16-year-old Miley bumped and grinded with 44-year-old Adam Shankman. Even if Miley and Adam knew nothing illegal was about to happen, it's still gross for the rest of the world to witness a child dirty dancing with a man old enough to be her father. Oh, who are we kidding, old enough to be her grandfather. She's a Cyrus, after all.

-Gawker
May 12 2010