«THERE SHOULD BE COURSE IN FIRST GRADE ON LOVE»

Are men shallow creatures who are ready to jump at the chance of escaping commitment, looking to cop a feel, or more from any woman they meet? No, no and no!   Sand, Fisher, Rosen & Julia Heiman, Director of the Kinsey Institute, say we should pay attention and ask men, rather than presume we know. And they did just that. The researchers conducted an eight country random survey of 27,839 men ages 20-75 (Journal of Sexual Medicine, 2008, vol.5, 583-594). Using a tool (pun intended) called the Mens' Attitudes to Life Events and Sexuality (MALES) the authors found that men's perceptions of masculinity and quality of life differed markedly from the stereotypes above. Interestingly enough, the study also compared men with and without erectile dysfunction. Amazingly, there were no significant differences between those two groups on the MALES items.
So what is most important to men if it's not a great sex life? Drum roll, please! Across all countries, being seen as a "man of honor" was the single highest ideal in the masculinity section of the study --far more important than "being physically attractive," "having success with women," or "having an active sex life." Together with "being in control of your own life" these two attributes accounted for about 60% of the responses.

Psychology Today
Jan 30 2009