“IT'S CALLED GOSSIP AND OF COURSE IT'S AN OBSESSION OF MINE -ANDY WARHOL

Instead of getting offended, former Toronto Sun sex columnist Valerie Gibson took ownership of the cougar moniker, writing "Cougar: A Guide for Older Women Dating Younger Men" (Key Porter Books, 2002) the same year she first heard it in Canada. "I thought, 'That's a wonderful image of older women,'" Gibson says. "Throughout history, we have never been in charge of our sexual lives past 40, but now we are. We are vital. We are sensual. We do the choosing, dumping and picking. It's a wonderful control."In her book, and in the revised edition, due out next year, she talks about the new breed of single, older woman as "confident, sophisticated, desirable and sexy," a woman who knows exactly what she wants ("younger men and lots of great sex") and what she doesn't ("children, cohabitation or commitment"). The new edition will also have a section for pumas, or cougars in training.Gibson, whose last marriage was to a man 14 years her junior, is frank about why the age disparity works. "Women in their 40s and up are in their sexual prime and young men hit their sexual peak in their late 20s," she says.

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July 16 2008